Big James

James Cronin is a lazy reprobate known primarily for his work as a beaker on Bill Nye: The Science Guy. He has also been known to scratch himself in public. He started the Indicators in an effort to assemble an army bent on overthrowing a local McDonald's. So far, all attempts have been thwarted. Of particular interest is the fact that James is in no way funny.

If you would like to invite James to the Maury Povich show to confront him about being the father of your child, click here to email him.

Erin

She is far far away.

Candace

Candace was born on a potato farm in the great city of Idaho Falls, Idaho. Fate determined that she would be destined for a life of travel and glamour, mainly due to the fact that her mother was constantly on the run for falsifying her name in state park guest books. At the age of 12, after spending most of her childhood overseas where people did not believe in state parks, Candace returned to the USA to actively pursue her dream career in the world of cheese tasting. At 12 1/2, that went sour and Candace decided to tour the country in hopes of finally finding a home. At 17, she landed in Kentucky where she fell in love with a one-eyed, rambling man. This one-eyed wonder turned her on to the art of comedy, with which she fell in love, leaving the one-eyed man for her soul mate in this world and the next, laughter. Luckily, she's willing to share with the whole world.

If you would like to contact Candace for her "services" for your next Bachelor party, click here to email her.

Alaine

Creepy

Lil James

James was born in Winnipeg, Ontario on a leap year that has yet to be determined. He is a Sagiquarius. He enjoys doing Soduko, then whiting them out and doing them again. His favorite improv game is anything gibberish. His least favorite game is HATS. He enjoys long walks on glass and breaking stuff into other stuff and then gluing it back together and then giving it to someone and then it breaks again and he’s all like ‘ hey, you broke that.’

If you would like to tell James how cute he is for like the bagillionth time, click here to email him.

Neil

Neil was born a bastard love child, named after sexy Jewish crooner, Neil Diamond, (originally to be named Tristan but alas, a mutt dog, found by his mother while pregnant, received it first). Neil was permanently scarred after a jolted "old time car" ride at Holiday World threw him six feet from the car onto pavement, at 3 years old. The proof of such a tragic incident can be found at the base of his chin. When asked, what the greatest success in his life has been, Neil is quick to reply that personally breaking the worker's sex barrier at a local tanning salon when he was just 16 (becoming the first male to receive a job cleaning sweaty beds), has strongly remained the crowning point of his time here on earth; scorings one for the proletariat. Favorite books include the Boxcar Children series and early Goosebump novels. He also enjoys music and films about failed trips to the moon and the subsequent dust that collects in space after such a failure.

If you would like to hire someone to give piggy-back rides to, click here to email Neil.

Robert

Here lies R.G (ding) Rob (ding) Robert Greene. South Carolina's forgotten son has decided to rest in the Bluegrass. He leaves behind countless hours of senseless laughs and cries, but mostly laughs. Oh, I must have been dreaming because this horse is not dead yet! Peace, One-love, Holla and all that other cool shit people say.

If you would like to have a party and make your friends think you know Forest Whitaker, click here to email Robert.

Matt

Matt Gifford was not born, he was found by his parents 28 years ago, at the site of a large meteor crash. Matt's parents were at first a little weirded out when he suddenly lifted the family pick-up truck up over his head. They eventually realized that there was nothing to worry about, seeing that he hasn't done anything miraculous since then. His hobbies include sleeping, being 6' 4", air punching, dream catching and great sex giving. If you see him on the street, it is best that you don't make eye contact because he sees that as a sign of aggression, and he may throw his poo.

If you would like to have someone ruin a joke by explaining it to you after it has been told because that is what he does a lot when he tells jokes, he explains them thus ruining them and rendering them unfunny, click here to email Matt.

Ben

Ben Owens received his PhD from Subway University in 1997. Since then you may have seen him climbing the Great Wall of China every other Sunday. Originally from Canada Ben is happy to finally be in America.

If you would like to hound someone about free passes to an amusement park that we will not name here so that he does not lose his job, click here to email Ben.

Brandon

After being “born” one of the first (and failed) forays into gene therapy, Subject VD-437737 (or Brandon Meeks, ease of pronunciation typically being the deciding factor) packed up his extra chromosome and ventured to the bohemian artistic center of the Bluegrass State, otherwise known as Louisville. With a penchant for unnecessary wit and pure individualism, Brandon has found himself right at home. After brief stints in a few student productions, Brandon received an invitation to join The Indicators Improv comedy troupe. Eager to express his love of life and self-indulgence through comedy, Brandon is ready to bring his artistic tour de force to bear on all those he deems worthy enough to see it. His most notable works include a screen adaptation of the classic video game, Ninja Gaiden, as well as a screen adaptation of a screen adaptation of “Jack and the Beanstalk,” originally starring Gene Kelly

If you would like to have someone deliver obscure references to movies that went straight to DVD, click here to email Brandon.

Stanless Steel

Stanley Chase III was birthed by a poor sneaker making woman in the Czech Republic. His family finally got a break when Stan got cast as the kid that got his scooter commandeered in Back to the Future. He is also a little bitch, in a Patrick Swayze kind of way. Not Roadhouse Patrick Swayze, more like Dirty Dancing Patrick Swayze.